Monday, August 15, 2016

Dear Tinley Jade



Dear Tinley Jade,
I have a story to tell you, it's the story of your birth.

Did you know your momma was told she would be holding you in her arms on July 3rd 2016? That's right Saturday July 2nd at about 4 p.m. after talking to my midwife about my high blood pressure (160s/90s) she asked me to come in to the hospital for monitoring. After being monitored for 3 hours my blood pressure didn't normalize and so the midwife on call, Amanda told me we would probably have to induce labour so you wouldn't be at risk. Ironically enough just when they told me that my blood pressure normalized. As part of the routine checks before sending me home they checked my cervix and I was 5cm dilated, 90% effaced and you were in the zero station. At this point everyone thought I was in early labour so I was sent to a delivery room and given an IV.

We thought my contractions would pick up that night and that you would be here the next morning, but they never did. So, the next morning Mommy, Daddy and our other midwife, Sharon decided it would be in your best interest for me to go home and let things happen naturally. Gigi and Grandpa had already traveled up to see you so we had to tell them and everyone else they would have to keep waiting.

As the week drew on Mommy was starting to get impatient and her blood pressure was still a little unsteady so the next week I had two more doc appointments one on Wednesday and one on Friday at both appointments they stripped my membranes and sent me home with confidence that you would arrive over the weekend, I was excited!

Sunday July 10 your due date rolled around and you still hadn't come. That morning your Daddy and I went to church and all the while I remember just hoping and praying you would come soon. When we got home from church I went straight to my room laid down and cried. I wanted you here and you were just as comfy as could be. I however was feeling crampy and emotional. Finally Daddy convinced me to get up. I decided to be more positive and got ready to go do something with your dad to take my mind off of the situation. Just as we were getting ready to leave mommy's belly started to feel weird.

At about 5p.m. mommy's cramps turned into what I thought might be contractions. I immediately got on my exercise ball and was there for the next hour bracing myself as the pains came and went. Then daddy decided it was time we start timing the contractions. They started off about 7 mins apart and then got closer to 5 mins apart so daddy packed up the car with all our stuff to go to the hospital. We didn't end up going to the hospital though, because just as we packed the car the contractions became really irregular at times being up to 16 mins apart.

We didn't want another false alarm trip to the hospital so we went on a walk thinking that might speed things up, but had no luck. By this time it was after eight and Daddy was getting hungry. So we got in the car and headed to KFC. We figured I should try to eat something too in case this wasn't real labour so, I carefully ordered mashed potatoes, mac n cheese and a biscuit.

Once we got home I kept having contractions, but neither daddy or I were convinced they were the real deal. It was about 10 when dad decided to go to bed and I decided I would try and sleep the best I could. Daddy fell asleep quickly and I tried to sleep, but kept waking up. I remember feeling so confused I knew my body was feeling something it never had before, but I didn't understand why my contractions were so irregular. While daddy was sleeping mommy called Sharon one of our midwives for the second time that night. Sharon comforted me and advised me to try getting in the tub. Immediately I got in the tub and then was out and back in repeatedly.

At one point I called granny and we talked on the phone as I went through some of the contractions. After we ended our conversation things started to pick up. The tub no longer comforted me. Contractions were so intense I had to get on my hands and knees and brace myself.

At around 2 a.m. I yelled for Daddy because I knew it was time to go to the hospital. Waking Daddy from a deep sleep isn't always the most fun thing he was a bit grouchy and told me I'd have to wait until he was done using the bathroom. Needless to say that didn't go over well. Lucky for him though I have forgiven him!

Upon arrival at the ER I didn't wait for Daddy to unpack the car I waddled in as quickly as possible and asked for labor and delivery. The security guard promptly provided me with a wheelchair. They asked me all these questions and thankfully Daddy answered for me. Before we knew it the L&D nurse was down to get us. She asked me how many cm dilated I was at my last appointment and when I told her 5cm she took off. Daddy could barely keep up!

Once we got in the room Sharon the midwife came in and checked my cervix I was now 6.5 cm dilated. She suggested I get in the tub (birthing pool), but I was hesitant having just come from the tub at home. She said that it would feel much different here since it was deeper. At this point the pain was terrible so I agreed. I got in the tub and continued to labour losing track of time and just trying to get through each contraction. At about 5 a.m. Sharon checked me again I was 9 cm dilated and elated I had made it this far without any pain meds and thought, "Yes I can do this!". It was important to me to bring you into the world as naturally as possible.

Unfortunately, things didn't quite go like Mommy planned. After another hour of laboring and no progress Sharon suggested we break my water which would surely progress things. I agreed and once my water broke the pain increased tremendously. I labored for another hour and to my horror I had actually went back. I was now 8.5 cm dilated the pressure of the water bag was actually holding my cervix open wider. I remember feeling so discouraged, extremely tired and in a lot of pain. I continued to labor with the new midwife on call Leticia for 3 more hours without any progress before accepting the fact that medicine would a part of your birth story.

At 10 a.m. I begged for anything that could take the pain away even a tylenol. Leticia said to talk with Daddy and see if I really wanted to, I told her I didn't need to talk to Daddy. HAHA Ironically enough though I had to wait an additional hour for my epidural because the doctor was in surgery. In the meantime they gave Mommy Nubane(SP) It made things A LOT more bearable. The next thing I knew the Doctor came in and administered the epidural, but the other medicine was already working so well I actually fell asleep while getting it. That scared Daddy a little bit he thought the Doctor killed me.

Three hours later I woke up from a very relaxing nap and was checked again, by this time I was fully effaced, 10 cm dilated, and ready to push. With the support of Daddy and our midwife Leticia I pushed for 40 mins and at 3:34 p.m. you were born. Daddy loves to tell everyone that I just kept saying gimme gimme. Well at least you know you are loved and very much wanted!!

As curious as I was to find out your weight and length I didn't want you to leave my side. Finally, though I let them take you and voiced my guess of 8 pounds 12 ounces you were 9 pounds 5 ounces and 22 inches long. You were perfect and everyday since your birth my life has had an added JOY because of you!! I truly feel like my life has a deeper meaning. I never thought the sacrifices of being a mother would be easy, and it can be very hard at times but, for sure without a doubt I will always always always tell you and anyone who asks, "You are worth it" everyday, any day, all the days! I love you Tins ! Mommy and Daddy love you without reserve and we promise to do our best to entrust you to the Lord following his plan and ensuring that we will be guided to give you the best of ourselves.

Love, Mommy

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